‘It is enlightenment to know one's self‘ (Lao Tzu)
"When one understands self, and self's relation to its Maker, the duty to its neighbor, its own duty to self, it cannot, it will not be false to man, or to its Maker." (Edgar Cayce Reading 3744-5)
Tomasz-Alen-Kopera, 'Whisper-to-the-Real- You'
Most people I talk to consider ourselves to be very self-aware, and don't give much importance to introspection (examining their thoughts) or self-observation. Nor do they place much store in what others think of them, or try to learn from them.
But really, how well do we know ourselves and why we act as we do? The truth is, not much. Research has repeatedly shown that most of us have only a vague idea, if any, at given time about how we feel, what we really think, and why we act as we do.
Unless we make a conscious effort to know ourselves and why we what we do, we will shuffle along thinking and behaving as we have been conditioned to do, stuck in old habits that we hardly even recognise, much less question. Even when things go wrong and we begin to see that our ‘usual way of being’ doesn’t really work, many just muddle through, doing and thinking the same old things.
One barrier to self-awareness is that most people think that they know themselves.
What we usually know (and even then, not much) is our ego-personality, that accumulation of traits and expectations built up in response to life's hurts or disappointments, or learned from parents, teachers and others. Most make little or no effort to look past the surface, to observe our thoughts and actions, or ask ourselves, and Socrates urged the youth of Athens to do, 'Why do I think and act as I do? What do I really believe and value? and why?' We are so asleep to our inner selves that our own reactions to outside events often surprise us. We find ourselves wondering, "Now where did that come from?" or "Why did I say that?"
Another impediment to self-knowing is that we are overwhelmingly out of touch with our feelings, and what the spirit teacher, Seth, calls our basic feeling-tone.
Yet that fundamental feeling-tone affects our feelings, which determine how we see and respond to our inner and outer experiences. We do not realise that what we perceive and experience, even our emotions, are distorted by thick layers of self-delusion, conditioning and unquestioned beliefs and attitudes. With all that interference, it’s no wonder that we cannot feel or hear the little voices of our True Self, which speak to us primarily through our emotions. It's like trying to hear whispers through several thick walls. When we hear them at all (and some part of our unconscious mind always does), the messages come through all muffled and distorted, .
For example, I might feel love, but through my learned filters of mistrust, resentment, unworthiness or fear, I consciously register suspicion and doubt about love, and that can seriously limit my ability to recognise love, or to give or receive it.
Or I might feel anger (a perfectly justified emotion in some instances), yet by the time it passes through my belief that anger is wrong, my belief in blame and judgement, my fear or sense of helplessness, I may consciously register only hurt and resentment. I avoid questioning my anger and blame, and project it onto others.
Most of our relationship difficulties, personal and social, are due to unconscious projection.
We have to dig deep to know what we're really feeling.
Let's say you're basically a positive person, but lately, feeling dissatisfied with your life. You might tell yourself that you have a good life, a happy life, a loving family and all that comes with it. 'I'm just going bored" you might tell yourself, or "My health hasn't been too good, so I'm that's why I feel this way." You may be right.
But when feeling of dissatisfaction persists and grows stronger, you may start looking deeper. "Why do I feel this way? What's wrong with me?"
In oblique ways that disguise your discontent, you might bring it up in conversations. You might ask for divine help: 'Lord, guardian angel, unconscious mind, help me to understand myself.' You might begin to pay attention to your life, your relationships, your daily routines...your thoughts .... and to the inner voices: dreams, flashes of memory, insights into your feelings and actions ...
If you have the courage not to shut down these these voices of your spirit, you will one day realise that you are NOT the person you thought you were, that your life feel too small for you, fake, inauthentic.
You might even start making changes - change your job, find new friends, take up that creative work you once enjoyed. Yet with your newly expanded awareness, you still know that something is lacking.
What is lacking, dear friend, is You. Self-knowing takes time, it takes effort, and it requires that very difficult letting go of all your self-illusions. That, my friend, is the necessary big step, and it is not easy.
But be assured, friend, that self-awareness is within your grasp. Every soul incarnated on this earth has within itself the means to achieve it. And reward for such effort is priceless: Consciousness that knows Itself.
The question is, How strong is your desire to know who you really are? How much do you want to be authentic?
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